Monday, June 20, 2011

Mood- denial

Health- challenging

I waited all day for something to happen worth blogging about... I can't imagine how bored you are reading this. (no Refunds)

The saplings are still alive an awaiting planting...

The financial aspects of living like this are soul stealing to say the least... picture needing something and knowing that you do not have the money, have no way to get the money and no matter how bad you need it you will have to find a way to do without. I am a female... so you can guess what I need and have no way of getting... TMI times infinity, I know, but I promised life and the challenges and you are getting them.

I am working up the gumption to call the FoodBank to find out if they can help, but they might have trouble understanding why an adult would need nothing but baby food, pediasure and mashed potatoes. I was very lucky last month with coupons and managed to stock the house well with foods for my husband for almost nothing, but the foods and items I need are rarely on sale that a coupon will make enough of a difference with.

Think it is cheap to have a condition that makes eating a challenge? Think again...

Pediasure (that nutritional drink for children) costs on average $11.99 for a six pack, each one gives 240 calories and I should be drinking 2 a day to get the vitamins and minerals I need It can't afford to buy them every 3 days so I instead only drink one when my muscles are quivering and spasming so bad from magnesium deficiency that it feels like an Earthquake to try to stretch them. (Ensure is cheaper by about $3 but I do not tolerate it) Baby food jars might be cheap, but when grocery shopping I do have to buy the foods my husband needs and those little jars feel like a luxury item that we really can't afford, so I try to find things that we both can eat. I cannot eat beef... chicken and turkey often make me very ill, so we have to get venison (I get that when I visit my Parents in PA because it is only $6.29 a pound there), buffalo (10.99 a pound) and ground goat (which comes from a local butcher at 7.99 a pound but you have to buy at least 10 pounds and order it in advance since goat is not always available). What I would not give to eat corn... sighs.

So many who are suffering from Invisible Illness are disabled... they struggle to make it day to day, worry about paying the simplest bills and can only dream of the concept of a vacation or a night at the movies.

Yeah, I know, life is tough all over... people everywhere are suffering and my whining seems to be a bit overboard.

The thing is, I am opening my life to the world so that people can see the impact of having an Invisible Illness... so people can understand better the struggle of those who, through no fault of their own, are not asking to be taken care of but instead asking to be understood and perhaps a way to take care of themselves.

I have Gastroparesis... but it will never have me. I am a person suffering, not a disease... and I am not alone by a long shot!