Health- pessimistic
Today has been a very long day of research online into obscure concepts about a common condition that very few know about, trying to connect with strangers and have them care about something that is not happening to them and fighting exhaustion, brain fog and the urge to curl up and sleep.
The dehydration is still winning... yesterday I managed to get in 27 ounces by the time I went to sleep at 5am and so far today I have managed 12 ounces but the nausea that I face trying to get all that fluid in coupled with the painful bloating and pain is so not worth it.
Do I live in increasing agony to try to hydrate (but not nearly enough) or do I risk my organs and brain function by scaling back on the fluids to a more comfortable level?
Today I also got my much anticipated (and awaited) notes from my last two appointments from my knee specialist that I need in order to get a disability rating done so I can try to get lifetime disability through Workman's Compensation... and the deadline is August 4th... I have no idea if I can get this done in time.
There is a big week of Awareness coming up associated with G-PACT (www.G-PACT.org) which I will be helping with and I really need the energy to put my best out there... there is the huge situation in Mississippi that I have been working on every waking moment trying to get the family help. **UPDATE** They now have top legal counsel and the court date is postponed for the moment as their new Lawyer works to gather all the information he can for them and one of the things they need is pediatric Gastroparesis/motility Specialists that are willing to chime in and either testify or write in reports.
I am so very tired... my pain level is a 8+ (out of 10) and I have no idea how long I can keep up this pace, but I am going to keep it up and I am going to keep fighting because there are people out there that need people to fight for them.
One of the biggest fighters I know is in the Hospital as I type this, she is battling to get the treatment she needs so she can get back to the fight as well... she is my inspiration and her story is amazing. (www.bluelightningjeep.blogspot.com)
Sometimes we just have to fight even when we have no energy to fight with because if we won't... who will?
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